“The World is Her Oyster”
January 25, 2010
Why are many middle-aged women today lonely, unhappy and childless? Because when they were young they were told they could have it all. Female fertility peaks in a woman’s twenties and her attractiveness to men does too, but they weren’t informed of these basic facts of nature.
Feminists continue to feed young women the myth that they can get married and have children whenever they want. Look at Sarah Palin’s words to her daughter Bristol on Oprah last week:
“I’m telling her, don’t think she has to find a man and marry young. The world is her oyster and she’s going to be able to pursue an education and career and avocation opportunities without a man.”
Some people have said that Mrs. Palin had her own children young because she saw through feminism and believed a woman’s commitment is to her family first. But this obviously is not the case. Here she is advising a daughter who already has a child to not form a family of her own right away or feel any need to get married young. When even supposed conservatives are stating these falsehoods, it is likely that the loneliness and unhappiness of the modern woman will continue to be nourished for many years to come.
—- Comments —-
Hannon writes:
It was amazing to watch that clip from Oprah’s show. Palin was clearly frustrated that Bristol would not provide the answers she was being prompted to spout. But Bristol held tough and was confident, displaying more maturity and composure in the span of a few minutes than most of Hollywood starlets do in their whole careers.
Hence, when you wrote, “When even supposed conservatives are stating these falsehoods, it is likely that the loneliness and unhappiness of the modern woman will continue to be nourished for many years to come,” I would have agreed in principle. But I begin to doubt when a young woman deftly defies her own superstar mom and Oprah at the same time on national television. Maybe there is hope after all.
Laura writes:
Yes, Bristol’s declaration of abstinence until marriage and her defiance of her mother in public were significant events. I am thankful to Kidist Paulos Asrat for writing about this because the episode was virtually ignored by the mainstream press. Hannon is right. Perhaps there will be more Bristols who have the nerve to question the wisdom of powerful mothers.
Karen I. writes:
I am no fan of Sarah Palin, but I think you are being a little tough on her with regard to her daughter, Bristol. I think Mrs. Palin is in a difficult spot with that daughter of hers and doing the best she can. By becoming a pregnant teenager, Bristol did something that most parents would have trouble coping with. To her credit, Sarah Palin did not encourage her child to have an abortion as so many in her public position likely would have. She is standing by her daughter, and she is helping to raise the baby, which is more than many parents would do. While Bristol appears to be sincere in her chastity pledge, she has already shown she lacks self-control as far as sex goes. It seems to me Bristol is trying to get attention. She got pregnant while her mother was running for vice president, and now she goes on national television to state a chastity pledge. Why can’t she simply make a quiet vow to herself to do better in the future without proclaiming her newfound virtue on Oprah? Because she wants attention, and she is getting it. She is not the first publicity-hungry young lady to do this and if I recall correctly, none of the others have maintained their pledges. But, it did get them a lot of attention as the press followed them around, looking for evidence they have not lived up to their word and writing suggestive articles every time they got a new boyfriend. I am sure the same will happen with Bristol and I am sure the Palins know it. Maybe she can be on a reality show next, and we can all watch to see if she maintains her chastity pledge. Or, maybe we can tune in to the radio tomorrow to hear the trash talking DJ (and a whole lot of other men calling in) volunteering to help her break her pledge. She will get more attention by being the “chaste” girl carrying an illegitimate child around than she ever did being a single mom living with her folks.
Laura writes:
I agree Mrs. Palin is in a difficult spot and will likely be drawn into the messy aftermath of Bristol’s early pregnancy for a long time to come.
But, I do not think Palin has acted heroically for her daughter. In some ways, she has made Bristol’s life much worse. Palin drew Bristol into the national spotlight when she knew her daughter was pregnant. By Palin’s own admission, Bristol was “devastated” when the story hit the news. (It’s not believable that Palin thought this wouldn’t be picked up by the media.) Palin could have declined the offer to run as vice president out of consideration at least for her daughter and future grandson.
I also think she bears some responsibility for her daughter’s pregnancy, for not providing her with the supervision and constant warnings about sex she needed. It was obvious Palin did not take the sexual maturity of her daughter seriously, judging from her remarks to Barbara Walters. “Didn’t you know there were things you could do to prevent this or not do it all?” she said to Bristol when she learned of her pregnancy. In other words, this family-values conservative thought her 17-year-old daughter should have been using birth control. Her comments to Walters showed detachment from her daughter’s personal life.
If Bristol is just seeking publicity, it seems it would be better for her to promote general abstinence instead of go all the way and say that she personally will not be having sex again until marriage. My impression from a previous interview of her in People magazine was that she took her abstinence drive seriously. This may all be grandstanding, but she seems to genuinely feel for girls in her situation. If she does feel for others and does take her campaign seriously, she is under an obligation to set herself up as a model of what she preaches. The only way for her to do that is to pledge abstinence outside marriage for herself.
Karen writes, “She will get more attention by being the “chaste” girl carrying an illegitimate child around than she ever did being a single mom living with her folks.”
It’s true, this may be just attention-seeking, and a cheap way to redeem her image, but having encountered the full force of negative publicity before, Bristol must know what the embarrassing consequences will be if she fails to live up to her pledge. She would be stupid to make it if she wasn’t intent on keeping it.
