Norman Rockwell’s Cousin Reginald Catches the Thanksgiving Turkey (1917)

MARK MONCRIEFF writes from Australia:

I have a question about American culture. We see it so much on TV and in the movies that sometimes it’s easy to forget it’s not the same as ours. It mostly is, but say about 20 percent isn’t. My question is, would an American family that could only get together for one holiday prefer to get together for Thanksgiving or for Christmas?

We don’t have Thanksgiving in Australia and on TV and in the movies it seems like basically the same holiday with different titles…..or has TV lied to me?

Laura writes:

Christmas is a more important and meaningful holiday, but some extended families prefer to get together for Thanksgiving because many people, especially families with children, want to stay home for Christmas.

The family has changed so much that many more people spend the holidays alone or with relatively few people than in the past. I think that’s a major reason why Christmas shopping has taken over Thanksgiving weekend. Now some people head out for the stores on Thanksgiving night.

I was at the dentist last week and, though my mouth was packed with cotton wads, I asked the dental assistant, “At are oo doing ‘or Ansk-i-ing?”

She said her nine-year-old son would be with his father for Thanksgiving Day and she would be making a turkey dinner for herself and her son on the weekend. How depressing. When I was a child, there were at least 12 other children for the whole weekend. Our tradition was to all come down with a case of Thanksgiving stomach poisoning during the weekend. One time the adults left my sister to babysit ten or so children under the age of ten. They all started retching and one child simply leaned over the third floor banister and let the remains of her Thanksgiving feast go.

The man who cuts my hair is spending Thanksgiving just with his wife, which is shocking because he is a very social person and has hosted his extended family many times. His son will be with his girlfriend’s family and his daughter, who got married last year, is traveling around the world with her husband for an entire year instead of staying home and starting a family. It will probably be years before he has a grandchild.

— Comments —

SJF writes:

Here is a description of our intended festivities.

We are not native to our current city, and our relatives are far away.  We expected to spend the holiday alone, but some good friends invited us to their house to celebrate with their in-laws.  There will be two families and twelve children ranging in age from 15 to 5.  My wife is making the dessert, and mashed potatoes.  I will bring the wine and a bottle of very good Scotch.  Everyone is dressing for dinner. My understanding is that the dinner will start with the reading of some traditional Thanksgiving speeches and stories.  The younger children will be required to recite their favorite poem.  We will then each be asked to describe what we are thankful for.

After dinner, I imagine the boys will take their AR15-style airsoft rifles outside and engage in a massive war in the large backyard (the weather here is supposed to be warmer than usual).  After it is dark, they will probably switch to “Ghosts in the Graveyard.” The men will help clear the table (yes, I know, it’s not our role and a bit metrosexual, but it means we will be able to fill our glass when we drop off a plate in the kitchen), and then finish the Scotch and probably smoke cigars.  I am looking forward to good conversation about homeschooling, the Mass, living as Catholics in the world, politics, the Bishop of Rome, guns, hunting and travel.  In sum, it may be 2013 out there, but it will feel like 1953 where we are.  We have a lot for which to be thankful, including TTHW blog.

Laura writes:

Thank you.

Have a wonderful time.

A reader writes from California:

Happy Thanksgiving. We will be celebrating with lots of people at different times and places. We will eat traditional turkey on Wed with the poor people, served by the local Kiwanis Club, which I belong to.

On Thursday, we go to Ojai (major New Age California hippie town) for a first, and I hope last, vegan dinner. Don’t laugh and don’t feel sorry for me. These are dear friends and that’s how they eat, and they invited us —- I never complain about food that is served to me with love.

 Laura writes:

I wouldn’t mind trying a vegan Thanksgiving if it was made by a good cook, but I bet it’s a lot more work than turkey and stuffing — or Thanksgiving pizza. The Pilgrims would have died if they had been vegans.

Joe A. writes:

We will dine on traditional turkey and associated delicacies with our children, remembering our fathers unto our great, great, great … grandfather William Brewster, who led the first American Thanksgiving celebration, grateful for nearly 400 years of our family’s life and prosperity in the New World.

We will also contemplate their momentous decision to quit England, choosing a life of primitive deprivation rather than suffer the dictation of their souls.

What’s old is new again.

Jewel A. writes:

Here’s a treat for you concerning the history of Thanksgiving from a Catholic perspective:

And a post I’d written about Thanksgiving of 2007, after reading about your own experience with the holiday as a child:

A scene from last year’s Thanksgiving dinner:

We approached the groaning table, heavily laden with the most delicious-looking fare ever, at least upon first glance. The turkey, the crown jewel of the table, remained uncarved, and blushed the slightest kiss of beige, while the stuffing, uncooked and wet, ran like diarrhea from the cavity into a puddle of congealed and cooling blood, which surrounded the bird like a moat. We gasped….and timidly, we each put a small spoonful of mashed potatoes onto our plates, with gravy that came out of a packet, followed by the cornbread, sage sausage and roasted apple stuffing I had wisely brought as my contribution to the feast. Beside the tiny mound of stuffing, I put the disintegrating broccoli crowns, which had been punished until they were safely olive drab, and went out to the little card table that had been prepared for “our side” of the family, while all 9 of the “other side” were eating together at the large table in the dining room. I wasn’t resentful. It was bliss not to have to look at the turkey. Or to eat it, for that matter. Emily suggested we pray, and in spite of my husband’s family’s complete lack of religious traditions, and the wretched fare before us, we bowed our heads and gave thanks. No one in the dining room noticed, as they were raucously enjoying their dinner. I tasted the mashed potatoes, which were genuine, and light and fluffy…and unsalted, unbuttered, and clearly had been mixed with water. Only my freely running tears added a reasonable amount of seasoning to the paste. My mother in law doesn’t believe in milk, in butter, or salt and pepper. I swallowed, choking back the paste, and smiled from afar at my mother in law. “They’re so smooth, mom,” I said. We went home hungry. Rachel made herself some ramen noodles and slurped them with comforting satisfaction, while the noodles splashed their salty broth all over her cheeks. At least one of us was happy.

Okay, I exaggerated a bit. But not much.

On a lighter note, my daughters and I love Thanksgiving, because we all get to cook together. I’m spatchcocking the bird this year, to avoid the dry turkey breast. I should have thought about doing this earlier, since I do it with chicken all the time.

I pray and hope your holiday is safe and warm. I’m still not sure about the Thanksgiving pizza. But there are leftovers to contend with and that might just be the ticket!

Laura writes:

That’s hilarious.

Happy Thanksgiving.

Paul writes:

Thanks for another of the many wonderful paintings by America’s Rockwell, if our Aussie friend does not know.  If anyone wants to understand traditional America, they need only look at Rockwell.  My favorite is the staid physician about to inject the fearful boy in his rear.

Perhaps the main differences are Christmas has wonderful gifts, Mass, more solemnity, and more joyfulness.  Thanksgiving is about family and thanks for food given to us by God through the native Americans, while Christmas is about family and Christ.  Christmas “magic” and “miracles” have always been a part of Christmas lore, but today those words are used often as anti-euphemisms, attempts to distance Christmas from Christ.

Take heart though.  The Media bosses know how to make money.  The bosses have been producing wonderful Christmas TV movies for years at an increasing rate.  Our Aussie friend might check out a satellite network for the Hallmark channel and the Lifetime channel beginning in November.

Fortunately I was never poisoned at Thanksgiving, but I was forced to lie down.  One of my cousins was married to a sweet woman of Italian descent, and she prepared a delicious repertoire of traditional Thanksgiving fare, which included pork roast and ham.  It was a feast.  When I got home with my parents, I had to lie down.  I was not nauseated or having cramps.  I was worn out.  It turned out that the whole family had the same reaction.  The culprit was olive oil, which is what helped make the feast delicious.  My family was not used to eating olive oil.  The feeling passed after a couple of hours.  (My Sicilian grandmother was not there because it was not her side of the family.  I’ll bet she would not have been worn out.  I don’t recall whether her son, my father, was affected.)

Happy Thanksgiving.

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