THE Century Association, the exclusive Manhattan club which first accepted women under the threat of legal action in 1988, has severed its relationship with a British institution, the Garrick, because the London club still refuses to admit women who are not accompanied by men.

Credit goes to the Garrick for maintaining some resistance to the demise of the cushy all-male preserve. Interestingly, according to The New York Times, hundreds of members of the Century, which is supposedly a club of intellectuals, voted against the decision and some vocally protested it. There is still some life in America.

“A man must partly give up being a man/With womenfolk,” Robert Frost wrote. It is hard to envision the rural poet in either club, but he would have appreciated the spirit of the resistance and the desire for a club where the conversation was manly. 

Perhaps someday it will be illegal for club members to disagree with women. After every statement a woman makes, the male club member will be required to say, “That is fascinating. Please tell me more” or “You are so right” or “Why didn’t I think of that?”

                                — Comments —

Thomas F. Bertonneau writes:

Clubs whether all male or mixed have never interested me, but I fully understand their rationale. For some years, with two or three of my professional colleagues (men), I have participated in what we together refer to as “The Seminar.” This is nothing in the way of any official, on-campus affair, in the context of which it is risky if not explicitly forbidden to speak one’s mind; it is a semi-regular conviviality held in one of two public houses in Oswego, between which we tend to alternate. A typical “Seminar” lasts about three hours or three pints each per participant, with a few snacks. Male conversation is different from conversation in mixed company – and it is necessary. Sometimes we are philosophical and sometimes we are satirical. The main thing is that we are untrammeled. Over the years we have reconnoitered one another and we are confident that we can be candid in what we say. 

Old-fashioned barbers and barbershops deserve a word. I have been taking my custom to Doug, a local barber for about a decade. This too is an all male institution. Usually there are two or three people in line for a haircut and everyone – the fellow currently in the chair, the barber, and the waiting customers – talk about this that and everything. Often it is politics. Many times it is women or marriage. There are debates, sometimes quite fierce, but no one ever takes offense at a differing opinion. One rarely sees a woman in Doug’s shop. When it happens it will be a mother shepherding a child for his haircut. Her presence puts a noticeable damper on male sodality and conversation tends to resume only when the woman departs. 

I am always happier – better reconciled to the world – when leaving either “The Seminar” or the tonsorial parlor.

Marilyn writes:

I am submitting this comment with the full understanding that it will likely not be published as I am one of those young foolish women who is a student and am happily committing to being a career woman that  you seem to highly disapprove of. You will, however, be happy to note  that I am also not an American and have no intention of being a mother  so you do not need to worry about more children in day care and public schools. Note that I have always been single and have every intention  of dying a virgin, but that is not the point. I am sorry I got caught  up in defending myself before you even accused me of anything, I guess you now know I’m nervous.

I was just curious as to what you (and others of like minds) think of  all women clubs. I am not talking about the painfully sexual  ‘sororities’ one often sees in universities and colleges, but if women  wanted to gather to talk about life, literature, politics, or what have you. I agree that it is rather wrong for them to close all-male clubs because men do, from what I understand, need somewhere to go to  unwind, but I was wondering if women do not need somewhere like this as well. Now I’ve never actually heard of a women’s club excepting perhaps book clubs , but would you give them the same respect you  would a men’s club? Would you agree that to force an all women’s club to go co-ed was wrong as well?

I am sorry if you find me to be wasting your time, but I would be interested to hear your answer on this subject.

Thank you for your time.

Laura writes:

If you read through this site, you will find that I post critical comments.

There are only three types of comments I don’t post: 1) those that are too long or unrelated to the topic on hand; 2) those that are very minor and may come at a time when I am working on something else; and 3) those that wish me harm, suggesting that I die in a vat of boiling oil and suffer eternal damnation.

 I’m sorry to say, but even though you are not an American and will not have children in day care, I reserve the right to worry about your future.  I sincerely wish you the best. I do. I hope you don’t die a virgin. I hope you live a very long life and die a peaceful death with your children and grandchildren nearby. If you do become a career woman, I hope you flourish and achieve excellence in what you do, but I also hope you never glorify that choice for the majority of women. While every woman need not become a mother and wife, a culture that devalues motherhood is sick.

Women should have exclusive clubs when they want them. Absolutely. Traditionally, their clubs have been their homes or community organizations. Women are able to find exclusivity and privacy with other women while men are at work. Men couldn’t find this in an informal atmosphere away from work because there was usually a woman at home. 

I wish there were more all-female clubs that were not founded on feminist assumptions and more national organizations of women that valued women as they are and supported femininity, childhood, the needs of men, community, learning, the arts, and literature. I don’t mind talking to a man about his job, but with women, that seems a waste of time. We have other things to discuss.

Men don’t seek to break into women’s clubs the way women seek to break into men’s clubs. There are a number of reasons for this. It’s not simply because men’s clubs have been overwhelmingly more powerful and possessed more wealth. A woman can adapt more easily to a gathering of men than a man can adapt to a gathering of women.

The traditional exclusion of women from powerful male clubs did have its drawbacks as some women enjoy conversation with men. But the solution isn’t making such a club coed because then it is no longer a place where the woman who likes conversation with men can converse with them. You get my drift? Ideally, there are associations that are mixed and those that are for one sex alone. 

Gail Garrasi Aggen writes:

I believe that women can maintain a gender-exclusive club anytime that they allow the men to opt out.

Kind of like that notion that if I ever want some time alone for uninterrupted thought, I merely have to give the family the option of joining me in the kitchen to do the dishes.

Actually, there is one thing that could jeopardize the exclusivity of the women’s group – the inclusion of refreshments at the meeting. However, the ladies can at least ensure the gender purity of their discussions by serving the food at the outset, before they start their fascinating female conversation.

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