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How to Dissolve a Culture, One Couple at a Time « The Thinking Housewife
The Thinking Housewife
 

How to Dissolve a Culture, One Couple at a Time

April 18, 2012

 

N.W. writes:

The “Childless by Choice Project” was recently the subject of an NPR feature. The project is the brainchild (presumably the only child) of Laura Scott, who in 2003 happened to be perusing Madelyn Cain’s book, “The Childless Revolution.” Intrigued by the idea that there really might be such a revolution, Mrs. Scott decided to travel the country to talk to the common everyperson and find out why so many married couples had decided to forgo having children. From this journey came a blog, a book, a documentary, and a FB group all concerned with couples who have decided to live child-free. Here is her story.

What I find particularly disturbing about Scott’s project is the insidious way in which she turns an unfortunate condition, childlessness, into a desirable goal, living child-free. The whole thing causes me to wonder how far away we are from having Child Catchers, like this, who catch children and use their teeth for necklaces and their eyeballs for earrings.

Of course, if relationships are all about personal fulfillment I guess we shouldn’t be surprised when one unfullfilled partner decides the other partner is getting in the way and decides to do away with this impediment.

                                — Comments —-

Kimberly writes:

Many of these “childfree” people are probably childless because they cannot possibly grow up themselves. I went to Scott’s Twitter link and the first twitter topic that popped up was this article about how “unfair” the workplace is toward childless employees. While I completely agree that mommies have no business trying to juggle a job and children at the expense of their employers and fellow employees, I was disgusted, and a bit entertained, by the whiny tone in this article. “They assume that because we have no children we have no lives” was the ultimate theme. Good grief! Can you sound any more like a teenager? Is it that hard to comprehend that children are dependent upon their parents? They didn’t make any observation of this crucial point. Rather, they cling to the “poor-me-it’s-all-about-me” punch-line as if we care. Quit whining as if Mommy can do something about it and pull the weed up by it’s roots all by your damn adult self!

It is nice, to an extent, to find that non-feminists and good men are not alone in their frustration with the “family friendly workplace”. At the same time, the idiotic way they argue their points is just another frustration for us. It’s a pretty sure bet that nothing productive is going to come out of their movement for a child-free way of life. They are selfish and immature, and that sums them up, each of them.

Carolyn writes:

How far are we from having Child Catchers? They have arrived. Parents are trying, in the broad light of day, to kill their adult children because they’re not perfect.

Lisa writes:

Kimberly and Carolyn said it all. We just recently watched Chitty Chitty Bang Bang again, with the child-hating Baron and Baroness Bomburst from Vulgaria who send out the child catcher to rid their land of children, so the Baron and his bride can have all the toys and be the only children.

A reader writes:

The “childless by choice” couples harm not only themselves but others as well. My wife and I have had to deal with some of the fallout. We are five years married, with no children due to difficulties with fertility. It has been extremely difficult for both of us, but particularly for my wife, who blames herself, though the problems are outside of her control.

In a healthy society, I think people would recognize that we had a problem and let us alone. In this society, we get a constant stream of comments from friends, family, and acquaintances who are eager toeither criticize us or praise us for not having children. Everyone assumes we are “childless by choice” because so many other couples are.

Johann Happolati writes:

There must often be a more personal aspect to this “childless by choice” thing. Lots of women say (and no doubt believe) that they aren’t interested in having children, until they find a guy they’re enthusiastic about. The pretence (and even the self-deceptive acceptance of your own pretence) is a normal part of relationship negotiation—in particular, a woman doesn’t want to seem too eager. That’s fine, and men do similar things. But if you’re married and your wife still doesn’t want to have your children, then most likely she just doesn’t love you.

Laura writes:

Yes. Absolutely.

It’s a deep form of betrayal.

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