Happy Father’s Day

[Reposted]
THIS 2010 piece, “Are Fathers Necessary?,” published just around Father’s Day in The Atlantic almost 15 years ago, sadly could have been written yesterday:
The quality of parenting … is what really matters, not gender. But the real challenge to our notion of the “essential” father might well be the lesbian mom. On average, lesbian parents spend more time with their children than fathers do. They rate disputes with their children as less frequent than do hetero couples, and describe co-parenting more compatibly and with greater satisfaction. Their kids perceive their parents to be more available and dependable than do the children of heteros. They also discuss more emotional issues with their parents. They have fewer behavioral problems, and show more interest in and try harder at school.
Got it, Dad? We don’t need you.
The most important institution — fatherhood — is the least celebrated. The deference and respect due to fathers is so often attacked most people don’t notice it. The government even conspires to keep fathers out of their homes.
Can you imagine what it’s like to know your father spent 15 minutes conceiving you in a loveless act and then handed over his contribution to a medical technician? It hurts. Losing a father through death hurts, but losing a father through cold deliberation and medical innovation must hurt even more.
In Charles Dickens’ David Copperfield, the protagonist is a young boy born without a father. The trajectory of his life is established from the beginning by his fatherlessness. It mattered that his father was gone: (more…)
