MY AUNT MARY, who is now 80, was stunningly beautiful when she was younger. She had golden hair that she kept long and rolled into a French twist at the back of her head. The sunny yellow of her hair complimented her fair skin perfectly. When her hair began to gray, she started to color it herself to keep it blonde and she continued to wear it in the exact same elegant style. Her hair was obviously very important to her. She once told me she did not swim in the pool in her backyard because the chlorine would destroy her coloring. (more…)

  PESSIMISM is not in being tired of evil but in being tired of good. Despair does not lie in being weary of suffering, but in being weary of joy. It is when for some reason or other good things in a society no longer work that the society begins to decline; when its food does not feed, when its cures do not cure, when its blessings refuse to bless.                                                            --- G. K. Chesterton, The Everlasting Man 

  BRISTOL PALIN has purchased a house in Arizona and reportedly is planning to attend Arizona State University. Presumably, she will be taking her young son with her, moving him thousands of miles from his father, or perhaps she will be leaving her son thousands of miles away. When Bristol's pregnancy was announced to the world, conservatives jumped to defend the Palins. Bristol did not have an abortion and that was enough evidence of family values. But the Palins have allowed Bristol to become a symbol of all that is wrong with single motherhood in America.

NORA writes:

Emily D.’s story is indeed very sad. In my experience, however, hardcore feminists are pretty outspoken about it, or they express opinions and attitudes that give away their position quite clearly to those around them. Didn’t her husband observe any of these characteristics when they were dating? I find it hard to believe that her attitude was a total surprise to him. Either she had certain extraordinary qualities (great physical beauty, perhaps) or, more likely, offered certain “benefits” that he valued so much at the time that he was willing to overlook her extreme feminism. (more…)

THE REV. James Jackson writes:

This is my favorite bit:

“Clear Creek is an intriguing fusion of contemplative ‘island,’ nature enclave and forest encampment. I am fascinated, like many baby boomers, by kinetic, intensely dedicated communities, companies and other ventures with strong missions, a laser-like focus and iconoclastic cultures: NASA’s hugely successful Jet Propulsion Labs (JPL), game changer Apple, Inc., the Teach for America operation, Herbie Hancock’s music shop, Elon Musk’s Tesla Motors, BMW, the film company Pixar, and Burt Rutan’s aerospace design shop come to mind. Clear Creek, to me, is another instance of this kind of collective rigor, discipline and focus.” 

EMILY D. writes:

My husband and I are always sad when I go to my brother’s home. My sister-in-law is the typical “modern woman” and her marriage to my brother is a microcosm of the feminist absurdity you write about. She never cooks, and as a result her son is a very poor eater and is overweight, even though he is only three. (more…)

SINCE I began this website, I have received a number of eloquent, personal notes from readers. These moving letters described serious personal suffering.  A middle-aged woman wrote of her marriage, one hellish experience after another, and her decision to avoid divorce. A man told me of a woman who had cruelly slighted him and belittled his expression of affection after their romance had ended. Fifty years old and divorced, expecting to live alone and never have another romance for the rest of his life, he was not bitter, just exhausted. A female reader wrote about her lifelong depression and poverty. She had begun to go to church by herself at the age of 10 because her parents were non-believers. A man wrote of serious illness.

I did not post any of these notes, even when readers gave me permission to, because they were too poignant and intimate. The best I could do was privately express consolation. Modern life is crushingly impersonal. Professionals will listen to you for a fee and provide a diagnosis. But there is often nowhere to rest your head. There is no place to cry for a few minutes.

I am praying for you this Christmas Eve. I have not forgotten your notes. Suffering is never wasted if we listen to what it has to say.

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SEE these comments at VFR. Daniel H. from Seattle writes:

Triumphant secularists love to point out that the timing of Christmas was melded with pagan celebrations of the winter solstice, as if that proved Christmas to be a fraud. But this, of course, is an impossibly juvenile response. Why is Christmas associated with the winter solstice, and not, say, the autumnal equinox or some other random astrological phenomenon? Because it is central to the Christian story that in darkest night, a light is born. It is the central theme of the Christian ethos. This idea is so central to all of Western society (thanks to Christianity), that even the most inane Hollywood schlock movie relies on that theme. It resonates with even the most degraded secularist because it is (a) oddly familiar for reasons he doesn’t understand, and (b) oddly true for reasons he refuses to acknowledge.

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THE all-male choral ensemble Chanticleer, of San Francisco, performs Charles Ives’ “A Christmas Carol.”  This is from the group’s excellent album, Sing We Christmas.

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SEVEN YEARS AGO, my husband went out on Christmas Eve to pick up some clothes at the dry cleaners. About an hour after he left, a large police cruiser pulled into our driveway. The moment before I saw my husband get out of the vehicle was sickening. I thought they had come to tell me of his death.

But he emerged from the cruiser. His head was cut up. He was shaken and he had large shopping bags in his hands. Here is the story of his adventure. (more…)

FORTUNATELY, there has been some backlash against the article in Sunday’s weddings section of The New York Times about Carol Anne Riddell and John Partilla, a New York couple who met at their childrens’ school and married after leaving their first spouses. There are many harsh remarks, as well as some comments defending the couple, in the comments section after the initial article. New York Magazine has a critical item, in which the groom regrets the publicity. One wonders if anyone has thought to contact the former spouses and ask what their reaction was when they opened a leading newspaper to find a glowing tribute to the affair that ruined their home lives. It would be similar to opening the paper and reading a glowing interview of a kidnapper who had taken your child.

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A regular reader writes:

I really enjoyed your post on race.

I think the people who complained about your entries on rape statistics (here and here) are missing the point. There are two basic groups in humanity: those who want to adapt to reality, and those who want all decisions to be subjective because they fear oversight. (more…)

IT  appears to be increasingly common for women to superficially disavow feminism. That means, when asked if they are feminist, they say, “No, I’m not a feminist.” But saying so doesn’t necessarily make it so. I can say I don’t notice cold weather, but if I wear a coat, obviously I do.

What does it take for a woman not to be a feminist? She must explicitly and publicly reject feminist principles. (more…)

  THE REPEAL this weekend of Don't Ask, Don't Tell is a further step in the reckless feminization of our military forces. How can men cultivate the traits necessary for combat and at the same time condone open effeminacy in their ranks or fight alongside women, as was recently recommended by a Congressional panel? Common sense tells us they cannot.  As Lawrence Auster writes: The country is about to embark, completely unnecessarily, on an insane experiment that will cause no end of problems for years or decades to come, turn the military into a sexual and litigious battleground between homosexuals and straights, and discourage the enlistment of capable men who will not want to serve in such a decadent Army, Navy, and Air Force. The homosexualists’ and liberals’ real aim is to turn us, militarily speaking, into the equivalent of the Netherlands.

HERE is a 1993 version by the King’s College Chapel Choir of Cambridge University of the lovely hymn, “Jesus Christ the Apple Tree,” an austere contrast to jingle bell clamorousness.

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ELIZABETH WRIGHT writes:

Perhaps you’ve seen this story of two selfish monsters who rationalize their destruction of both of their families.  It wasn’t so  long ago that even the New York Times would not have celebrated the remarriage of this man and woman, who “fell in love” with someone else’s spouse, and consider their decision to leave their children acceptable, because they are “soul mates.”  I mean, this is really stunning.

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BRUCE CHARLTON, writing at his blog, praises the extremely time-consuming, but rewarding format for commenting at this blog. He writes:

I am not a huge fan of comments on blogs.

Indeed, when I first began looking at blogs and for quite a while, I was put-off reading several blogs (despite enjoying the postings) because of the comments.

The postings might be good, but the world of the comments that followed them was horrific. (more…)